Category: unsubjected

CHAPTER 7. LETTER TO LOST LOVE

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chapter seven. “you carry the burden of a heartbreak that is not your own” she told me, as i sat there with her in target where they were serving starbucks coffee. i was wearing nike running shorts, my signature five panel cap and had come in for nothing more than a gallon of water and gum. she spotted me, and i suppose was responsive to my energy. she told me other things that were more validating for me. that of which will remain private and locked away, as many of her readings were very personal stories about life-long struggles i have carried and taken on for others who have both loved, and lost in my life.

from school boy crushes and love letters penned, long ago are the beginnings of my love stories. in this phase, love lost is never love forgotten. and this history with love, though longing, is a record that i am proud of. my stories of love show resilience, belief, hope and adoration. from the days i would sit in my room, against the speaker, listening to love songs and resonating with the feeling. or when i would sit and write to sort through my own developing feelings for someone- i’ve mastered the process of falling in love and securing what comes next. in today’s context, these moments still complicate realities for me. as a foundational element of my development, this part of my personality drives all aspects of passion. whether in contrast of shy or reserved nature, or the gunning emotion i feel to just go for it- it’s all inclusive.

these aspects of myself bleed into my love of inspiration, my love for development and my compassion for moments of struggle, seen also in my hope and strength to continue the good fight. many of my stories of love lost include moments of abandon, my worst fear being, ultimately, to be forgotten. in many of my artistic skills, i try to make each moment an experience. to touch a heart, move a mind or shift perception- all sourced from the fear that love will be lost, or worse- forgotten. whether i’ve created boundaries or walked away from past loves in life, the love has always lived on. in my current space, lingering like smoke- the same concept persists. yeah, i may have pawned the engagement ring, but i kept tattoo, and i still show respect. i still have hope, even though moments have past, in some cases years have gone by, but i still hold to hope. as crazy as all of it sounds.

love, to me, is an investment. if i love you, i respect you and allow you in where no one else can enter. i’ll hold you close and never let go- as a challenge, not even when you ask me to. it’s ever fleeting, unrelenting, it’s consistent- persistent and can suck you in. it’s pure, and to some, unrecognized. it’s confident without being overwhelmingly so, and it thrives on the nature to connect, reshape and revitalize with each smile shared or disagreement looked past. it’s the thought that keeps me up at night, or the light tug that i feel when i remember that i can’t call you or i miss hearing your voice. it’s an idea of romance that is forever inspired, keeps you looking toward the future with a little bit of sadness from the past. but you can never forget that it happened; maybe it’s not lost- just hiding somewhere, or looking for you while  you are looking for it at the same exact time.

in my own literary world, in my emotional story board- these moments haunt me. some comfort me, and others remind me of what i’ve overcome. my love is forever forgiving, forever thriving and boundless. all it takes is understanding, patience and time. to all those i’ve loved, i have pushed myself to love more beyond you, in an effort to rise above and past the pain from our interaction. where i am now, i have been willfully equipped to love in stronger, more resilient ways. love is my strongest suiting of armor. though i spare no space in being quick to respond, at time easily angered, i am also sensitively forgiving and vulnerably available to reason, talk and reconnect. with pain acting as the teacher, and love remaining the connector- i push forward, knowing which love i’ve lost and which love will live forever. i’ve learned to depart, remain connected and rediscover with strength in love. and now, this love story will reveal itself in a new way. i’ve collected only a few, but in this collective each of you wear crowns, some shining brighter than others but each in your own special way. while you may have lost your love for me, just know that somewhere, not too far from where we used to be, i still sit and wait for you. and i always will.

for my greatest moments of love
may your memories shine forever

CHAPTER 4. WINDOWS & DOORS

chapter four. opportunities come in as many dimensions as those who guide us to said destinations. the range of such vary from a needed push, a need to sit back, to surrender control and demand it. in life, we can be lead astray by misguided advice, lack of awareness or intuition; and disabled measures of trust in ourselves, and the higher power that lights our pathways. for a while, i kept looking for opportunities in doors, and advanced through many in my life. understanding that the method of navigation was all up to me; i looked down every hall, and walked into every building to find as many doors as i could, as advised by those who wanted to see me win. but as i walked through each door, the decor never seemed right. i felt myself arranging everything, and tailoring each space, through each door way, into the space i envisioned in my mind; but could never find. feeling like i needed air, i began to crave light and air.

dark spaces, with elevated temperature; each door contained bodies and minds, opinions and mindsets that didn’t agree with mine. whenever that would happen, i would exit that door and find the next one. getting progressively agitated, bothered and combating the feeling of being trapped; i took the leap of faith that brought me to new york city. i’ve been here for over a year now. guided by love and my own desire to be understood and connected; to function on a higher level. i dedicate so much time to information, to communicate about development. to connect everyone through beauty, through a common understanding that creates light and power. through each door, i understood more of beauty, more of light, and more of love. in this figurative, and rigorous journey of impasses; i found more of myself, more of others and collected insight through each entry and exit.

i kept looking at the windows; and cracked them for air, eventually closing them. and exiting through the next door. i repeated this pattern for several years, even into this year. and now, i’ve closed all doors, and jumped out the window. leading to a action of flight that i could have taken earlier, but wasn’t quite ready to see or ready to take action to fulfill. purposefully fragmented, something is coming. from meetings and options to my level of awareness and geographic location, i am humbled by the divine support that guides me and the real ones who can see me, in a real way, for my instincts and vision. I’m functioning on a level that is so elevated past bullshit, i am unchained, unrestricted by in a very intentional way that keeps me locked into the vision of it all. it’s about responsibility and unity in flight. togetherness and community being unified by beauty and execution. escaping a painted doorway to jump. not knowing, but trusting.

CHAPTER 1. INSIDE THE EXTERIOR

chapter one. social media has shit fucked up. and while my ability to prolifically express such a sentiment escapes me, the new year brings about a new ambition to document my journey of development through mirroring, theme and elevated awareness. a selection of twelve chapters will live in this space over the course of the next year. totaling to one post per month, and a living story to be told; in my words, the only fitting way my story should be told. much of my development has been constructed on the gauge of my ability to give. to be responsible, to manage up; to strategize and to properly assess the value of things- so that nothing and no one is left behind or forgotten. but in this process, i am the forgotten one. the exterior is a concept of reality and surface. much of the internal affects the external, and in the last month of reflection i continue to think of this concept more and more thoroughly; not being fooled by the outside, but not being naive to what may, or may not, lie beneath the surface of all things, tangible and unfelt.

the last month of the year seen me traveling back to my home of the bay area, in the northern region of california, and also in the southern region of the state, in los angeles. while much of the last year had been a tug-of-war with my heart, mind and my own endurance, the decision to move to new york had already been made and was set in stone. restricted financially, and bound by a promise i made to myself; i was planted and the ground that held my feet in place slowly became cemented here in the concrete jungle. the last year is this blur of struggle that only i know, truly, how hard it has been. traveling back home had my anxiety at it’s peak. as i boarded the A train from all the way uptown to queens, my body spiked with anxiety, i kind of wanted to run back into my apartment and hide in the purity of my all white bedroom. i didn’t sleep the entire night and packed after a dinner party with the agency, where i told the president, “thank you for making my dream come true, really”.

arriving at the airport terminal, clad in all black with luggage to match; i sat at my gate, 4 hours early, just so i could sit and think about everything that the last year had brought me. the love that i found, the dream i achieved and was living, and everything it cost to make all of that happen. tears welted up in my eyes as i sat there thinking about how hard i worked to scratch the surface of really making it. i thought about what i left behind at home, and wondered if everything would be the same; or if life had pressed on without me, leaving me an even smaller space than i had once had back home in the bay. as the plane took off, i began to immediately fall asleep to push the hours of flight away and to distract myself from the lack of planning i had made for who i would see first and who would see me.

first thing i did as i exited the gate was take a deep breath of the clean san francisco, california air the international airport terminal. in a flurry of just four short days, i seen friends that have become my family at the university of california, berkeley; seeing many familiar faces, none of which have forgotten me, or who i am destined to be. it was a good feeing. my cousin took me to in-n-out burger, and a few other spots i love to eat. my strongest ride-or-die homegirls helped me to and from the airport, and let me stay with them during my short visit. in the visit, i seen both sets of my grandparents, which is a blessing to my heart and mind. “don’t bring him here”, spoke one relative. and as my heart sank, i remembered why i left in the first place. right up against the christmas season, much of my familial has been reduced to it’s founding members; with convenient subtraction of those who have been categorized as problematic to the health of my life and aspirations.

i skated off to los angeles, after having a conversation with my girl, penny. “now do you see that you made the right choice to leave?”, she asked. i agreed. knowing that i made the best decision i could at the time i had made it. the familiarity of home is comfortable but can easily inspired complacency if not treated in the right regard. los angeles was my vacation; a place where i could rest, build and recuperate from the year i had in new york city. i was with leya; to help create a lifestyle structure for her apartment. this method of building took on many forms, from energy sharing, to scouting for interior pieces that fit the space and character of leya herself. to balance light with dark; to be mindful of lines and cleanliness. to eat the right food, to have the right attitude and listen to the right music all while sharing an open heart of inspiration and gratitude. the perfect start to a new year. i take with me the heartache of love lost, and understand that all pain is with growth. the concept of inside the exterior came to me; because the idea of home was romanticized. being inside of my looking glass, i realized i chose to extend outward, into the world i am now living. inside that exterior, i was able to help leya to create a new foundation for herself; and see much of myself in this figurative process of building, retracting and mindfulness.

with the goals of the new year already actively working in my favor, i remain filled with hope and am inspired to push forward in a real way; more confident in my instincts, choices and respecting the angel that brought me to new york. i know this year will be one of greater goals achieved, love received and more importantly, love reciprocated. to opening my mind to a boundless love that extends from my core and connects with that of my strongest partner yet. these hopes are now manifested in the writings of this piece, and the rest of my story will be told, as each month passes throughout this year.

BEYOND BELIEF

the reason i came to new york; my inspiration, a dream realized and a blessing on arrival. there are cosmic forces that push us in directions that we wouldn’t have taken otherwise. there are shifts in energy, and life has this way of uplifting through expectations in a way that is felt through a sense of delay. it’s about timing, it’s about being ready; about balancing surrender and consciousness. through the depths of darkness that have surrounded my life in love, and every other relationship, came this beautiful light. almost like the end, in this heroic montage of memories that blazed through the summer and shot through each of those nights we shared. providing solace in a time of tragedy and abuse. forgotten, unrecognized and unidentified in value.

locked away in my thoughts, in phrases of wishful thinking through the years. wishes for beauty of the heart, clarity of psyche, talent of voice, power through performance, strength in character and poise in potential; all in this refined packaging of confidence that understands one’s own worth and ability to transcend. so undeniable, that, the only fitting label is that of a star. my reason to turn the page, and closing of the now forgotten chapter, in the book of my life. a true blessing from the hands and heart of god, just as i had hoped, after all of those years from my vision and imagination; so much so that it’s real. and standing in front of me.

gratitude can’t even begin to explain, as i write the story of my now new life. with new challenges, new reasons to smile, and hidden strengths to uncover. with all blessings calls the importance to show gratitude in earning the permanence of such, through determination, dedication and belief. beyond that, there are now two hearts that seek to beat as one, while struggling to beat match like a DJ just learning how to spin on dual turntables. there lies a desire, with obstacles of doubt, but a purity and ease so fluid that it’s, in fact, hard to believe as even being real. intentionally abstract for the greater intent to shield privately, what is spoken here in prose so publicly shown, seeks only to document a feeling of love in a way that creates further manifestation of what is possible for two beings. in the vein of we and us, abandoning the challenges of the self identified “i“, which we’ve both leaned to, as default. veins running to the heart that will now beat for us, thriving as a source of unlimited loyalty, undying respect and boundless dedication to the strength that it takes to sustain such a love, that seeks to move beyond the limitations that have restricted us in the past.

for you today, and us tomorrow, leading to the we that awaits for our future; a confession more like a declaration, moving to further clarify whatever doubts may be clouding your heart. and beyond those clouds, is only the sunlight of my love. that burns so bright that it has burned others too weak from the past; but to you, in all your strength it is only a warmth that you lean to in comfort. the most important part of the story; the beginning and middle, that finds no end. these simple words are only a mere reflection of the depths of my love. in the ways that your voice reaches my heart, let these words forever remind you of my willingness and dedication to the fight that will forever protect the world we’ve yet to create.

 

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A TIME TO KILL

thematic patterns of darkness often play out in the writing seen here. whether you’re looking at an image i’ve self-shot on instagram, or even a video i edited from youtube- darkness lingers. there’s a wonder, often an unspoken emotion that is seen or felt. so i’ve been told. there is a dedication to perfection. i’ve said it enough times in this space, regular readers should be aware; i am the eldest of three. that aspect of myself has been the leading influence in my life. the expectation to lead is sourced from this position. the need to execute at a higher level, to be first, to be ahead and to not only do it, but to do it well and beyond that, with ease.

the attraction to darkness comes from the ability to walk into those spaces with a face of bravery, to stand in the face of adversity with strength. the spare-no-fucks type of attitude was culminated, crafted and etched into the ways that things are done because the bravery i have developed was not built through strength; but through failure, fear and gripping realities of inadequacy. the strength, or the bravery- that is all a side effect. you don’t plan to be brave, you don’t plan to do certain things. that’s just the resurfacing of fate. there lies the foundation of faith. knowing, through past fears, that once faced a greater, stronger era lies ahead.

speaking of killing. there are no human deaths. this phrase, in this new year, represents the killing of negative energies. represented are the killings of fear, misunderstanding and avoidance. abandoned are the doubts of capabilities, leaving only the possibilities that stretch far beyond the world that you have dreamt in your imagination. there is love there, there is success in this space. you hear of resolutions, you hear of aims and sparkling in the distance are goals- but let’s speak about commitment. dedication to separate killings from the living; in a way that reforms what is at the foundation of lessons learned and love earned. now is the time, because in the present lies the gift of the future. take the time to execute and kill all that is harming you and leave those harms in the past, where they will remain trapped, unable to affect you today, and forever.

THE PARALLELS OF HYPE & EXECUTION

it’s been a long standing tradition here at jeremydanté.com to raise the bar. who remembers when i used to redesign my layout annually? or who has been reading long before i was even housed at this web address and was still sub-domained? we’ve definitely evolved together and throughout this proposed content blockbuster of editorial coverage, i wanted to take a moment to recognize where we’ve been. in order to move onward and upward, a check point is necessary. the content that is being served up throughout today has been long drafted in my archives, but i’ve wanted to streamline content and a new direction in a way that wouldn’t make you feel jolted. though i love high fashion, i don’t want to be confined by it, i don’t want to allow my creativity to be held to any standard other than my own. by taking the opportunity to speak to my own audience, in my own words, i’ve learned a lot about who i am, who am i not and who i am destined to become.

in pursuit of these creative dreams, i’ve been able to align all of what i do to a standing theme of awareness. in speaking through my series, sundays with danté, or in speaking on forms of media or entertainment, the ways i’ve learned to identify aspects or differences of myself through such content is my greatest accomplishment. over the years, i’ve met and spoke with thousands about fashion, perception and simple opinion. we’ve gained friends, lost some and have also made the choice to detach from some. it’s all a part of the refinement process in becoming your greatest self. to discuss the parallels of hype and execution simply indicates to me, the pressure one feels to create. whilst receiving press over time, i started to feel like i was succumbing to the idea of how people perceived me rather than creating in my own organic state, free to think of my own influences rather than the influences of others for the sake of greater publicity. what is super dope to me, in this space, i have built a dialogue around something that i love. in functioning within the parameters of that pure love, i have been able to realize my own potential, to move past the idea of hype and go straight to execution. no tolerance for mediocrity or those who believe in anything other than affecting the art form.

realization is the first step, and i definitely aim to make greater leaps and bounds to execute on a higher playing field where i no longer need to worry about hype. there have been many characters in and around what i do and have done, and over time it’s become easier and easier to categorize such characters. in dissecting culture, society and the ways that media promotes things like beauty, age and race- i’ve been able to function with greater clarity. thus allowing my approach to execution to function much more freely. all this shit might not be making sense to you, but the idea of this space began with only my own development in mind and the fact that anyone has been interested enough to read, is success enough in my mind. for individuals, apart from me, to show care for my view point or to even wonder, or take action to question certain composition or perceptions is exactly what the internet and human interaction are supposed to do, this day in age. while my direction will continue to become refined and will alter slightly to reflect that change in quality, i hope that you understand the correlation between all content seen here. consistency is the greater goal. to successfully identify a theme that creates an emotional connection to image, for you, through your own imagination. while others may have the right machines backing them to function with greater levels of press and visibility, our work is from pure execution- no hype. what is discovered here in this space is known to be honest and true. we represent independent voices, and that has been my aim in giving myself the title, the face of fashion blogging in 2008. in identifying stronger sense of direction through understanding of visuals and sounds, no hype is greater than the belief one has in themselves.

SUNDAYS WITH DANTÉ: AN INTRODUCTION

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through my desire to create a greater sense of connectivity with you as an audience, i conceptualized a new weekly segment that will run every sunday, on my youtube channel. as a secondary off-set of jeremydanté.com, my youtube audience has grown, but none can compete with the audience that has been constructed through the content i’ve streamlined here. it’s always been about bridging the gap, creating a sense of community and the idea that, hey- we have a place here too. slated to air on the first day of fall, september 22nd, i wanted to create a series that would allow me to showcase more of me. though deeply personal, the content i provide or choose to dedicate energy to in this space is only a glimpse at who i am. i’d like to add another layer to that. the fashion report served it’s purpose, but through production, it felt too heavy, too uniformed as a report. there seemed to lack a sense of personality, which was almost hidden amidst industry chatter and new headlines. this new series will see me undertaking the task of showcasing what ties industries together, through my own level of taste, and my vision for what is new, now and next.

part of what has intrigued my audience of readers is my combination of presentation and sensibility with content. there are some things that are better left unsaid, just as there are some things better spoken than written. this new web series will see me tackling content from another standpoint, it will act as a free standing entity apart from this site, but will naturally resonate through a greater sense of relativity, as all things in the universe are connected. in personal conversations about the importance of this series, i’ve often discussed the idea of audience. i would like to think that, you, my audience are simply an extension of me. in the same ways that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, substance is in the mind of the reader. as the creator, producer of such content, you are the individuals who feed me in the same regard that i aim to feed you. while other bullshit blogs attempt to control their demographics through toting sales, or promoting labels- we discuss them. this an experience of discovering who you are, at the core, this is not about distracting you from reality, it’s about promoting greater self awareness within that realm of what it real. this is about expanding mindsets, not minimizing them. it’s about creating a subset of knowledge in relation to style that promotes a true representation of who you are through style. style is never being limited to just clothes, but the idea that- i put this shit on because this is essentially a part of my being. it’s about being a leader.

this process is about standing tall in your individuality to go beyond the confines of beauty, externally, to inspire trend, not to follow it. trend is a marketing tool used by an industry to incite sales, to move units to affect a bottom line. are you more than a financial statistic? are you a mere fiscal figure discussed in a board room? as a consumer, as a self-aware individual- that holds power. we should only be concerned with the business of representing ourselves. through our choices of clothing, our choices of music- while some may like to think there is no correlation, there indeed is. this series, for me, is to showcase what inspires me, what drives me, and to push the boundary of the ways in which i share myself with you, not as an audiences but as friends who have shared in my talents, in my love and my visibility as an artist. i felt it necessary to come and speak through writing, since that has served as a strong platform for the ways i am able to communicate, effectively. the sense of connection, besides industries, is to bridge the gap between me and you as well. there is no greater form of gratitude that i could ever share with you, than to share more.

in this age, it’s very easy for individuals to crosshair artistry for narcissism. or for others to misunderstand a level of substance for unnecessary drama. all in all, there are too many characters vying for one role that they’ve been taught exists. if everyone is trying to fit into this one mold, it’s in your best interest to serve as best you can in the role of being yourself. this moment, that will be this series, is to showcase and shed light and what i have done within my own process of self discovery. it’s about centering focus on how you can be a stronger you, and the greatest artist to create the life you want. it’s about progression, evolution- improvement. always about improvement. i hope that you share a little bit of your time with me from week to week, as i take on the challenge of creating content that can hold your interest, while culminating our love of strong visuals, vivid sounds and high impact methods of communicating. next sunday, see you there.